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  1. I've been together with my gf for over 8 years. We are lucky that everything “still works” and we still feeling 100% attracted to each other. However, after several years, it is normal (it doesn't have to, but it might happen) that sometimes people need a little extra effort because they got used to each other. We also experience days on which we need to spice things ip a bit. And there are several ways that can help. You also found your ways, but judging from your post you're not so happy with it. Maybe because you think it shouldn't be this way? I recommend to not overthink things too much. Do what makes you feel good and what brings you into the mood. You can also carefully talk to your bf about it. Try out new things. Prevent from having too much routine in your sex life. Share fantasies with your partner that make you both horny and excited for having sex. There's nothing wrong with you enjoying that vibrator and videos. Don't feel guilty 🙂 And if so, just try out new things and new ways.

  2. I’d start with kinks, and explore those together and get comfortable first. My husband and I had an open relationship, and it’s honestly a lot more work than you’d think. Just be honest with her or try to feel out what she thinks about those type of relationships. I was hardcore monogamous, but I ended up suggesting it so you never know. Listen to podcasts together, read all the books, journal. Take your time with it if she’s open.

  3. Yeah I am. I might try that but weed is very expensive. I was also using it daily during a rough time in my life so I wonder if it's by association.

  4. Doesn't medication come with a booklet? I specifically remember the pill I took years ago was safe after just 24 hours. I see questions like this so often I genuinely wonder if in america your meds don't come with a booklet, that lists all the side affects, what exactly inside the pill, meds you can't take and so on. If in doubt call your doctor.

  5. Your whole room should be locked and then you can get a little lockbox for your toys. Also pink cherry has key chain sized ones to actually answer your question.

  6. Same! For me it's also just being near them or the anticipation of seeing them what gets me wet. Works everytime and although it can be annoying, especially if you're not planning to have sex, I now just live with it.

  7. Phimosis, man. It doesn't seem quite severe but an urologists can give you all your options. Gotta look into it since it can be quite a complication during sex, even some that can seriously damage your penis. So go and talk to your urologists. The white part is probably the foreskin stretching too much that it turns white, like when you apply pressure to your skin and turns white? Like that. My guess is that your penis got a growth spurt and the foreskin couldn’t catch up

  8. Not really. You can start getting comfortable on your own. Finding situations that make you uncomfortable. Could be spending time admiring yourself in a mirror. Find something about your body you like, and build up from there. Case in point, I don't like my body. But in some light I find my arms to look fit and toned almost the right size. As for a partner. That's hard as only you can decide what you're looking for. And while 99% of the people you like might not like you back. 1% is still thousands of people in any city. Not to be vulgare but if you have boobs, guys will be interested. (Source: I'm a guy) you might be awkward but that's honestly not always a detractor. At times it's endearing and cute (broad strokes as your just a string of letters on a screen for me lol)

  9. Pay attention to her and what she is enjoying. I've found that if you tickle her butt while doing oral they like it, some even enjoy a little tickle with your tongue. When they are built up and close to Cumming slide that wet finger that was tickling there butt in the butt..this will usually push them over the edge and you will feel the contractions of them Cumming. But mainly talk to her and ask her to tell you if she is enjoying something or what she wants done to her.

  10. Go fuck somebody then come home and let him dive in and then tell him THAT is another guy's cum, see the difference? Then tell him to hit the bricks

  11. I get pushing it to the side or even taking it out while awake. That’s not the case here. It’s while I’m asleep with it in over night. That is where the question is

  12. Let me tell you my story, hope it helps: I got seperated from my first wife after nearly 25 years being with her. I'm very introvert, don't like clubs and do not consider myself a bodily appealing person. Our social circle came mainly from my wife's side. So here you are – some 40 years old, alone after the only woman you've ever been with (literally!), has left you. You have never had a single date in your life. Except THE one in your youth. That's me, back then. Dating apps where out of the question – Tinder and the sorts disgusted me. I didn't look for a fuckbuddy, I wanted a new partner (preferably for the rest of my life). How would an assortment of 5-10 properties and a selfie work for this requirement? For me? Never! I searched the net and found, what I was looking for: a dating website. Sounds dodgy, but let me explain: The difference between the kind of sites I mean and dating apps is, that they thoroughly collect a very detailed set of properties from people – these are kept private. Some very basic properties are public to other members, the detailed ones are not. They are used internally to do the matching. And this is way more 'on point' than it could ever be on Tinder etc. This means, as the service knows details about you like you're always planning ahead, need stability in your life and are introverted, borderline shy, love frequent sex and it doesn't have to be vanilla at all, it won't match you with some flippy club-girl stating that finanicial stability doesn't matter to her. In my case, this worked like this: I answered some 100 questions and was asked to select the 20 most important properties I'd want from a partner. Then I had to write a short presentation on myself. I decided to write the unembellished truth: I wrote the usual things, but also, for example that I'm very much into videogames (not very common for someone in his forties and possibly a major turndown), that I'm not the exporative type, always drawn to travel the world etc. I wanted for potential partners to know what they where getting into. The site started to throw potential matches at me, only containing the above mentioned basic info about them. The next step was to poke someone which meant, they were informed, that you liked their basics and offered to exchange the presentations. Only when both concurred, these were released. Then you had the possiblity to write to and were incouraged to get to know each other. The next step was to do a direct match. Same procedure as with the 'poke': one initiated the match, the other had to accept, then the 20 most important properties both had given as to being looking for, were released. From there, you could commence writing to each other. Long story short: I got to poking a total of some 5 women, matched with a single one and three weeks from creating my account, I had a date. I kept the records: 18 of 20 properties we sought were identical and she lived an hours drive from me. We met and it zapped instantly. She kissed me at the doorstep. Our first 'date' lasted the weekend, we moved together 3 months later and married after 2 years. We're inseperable and both agree, we'd been sure, we'd never find a new partner after our seperations. Now I like to refer to her as the second, but the most important love of my life. We're together for nearly 10 years now. Granted – this was the best outcome possible. But I wanted to tell you, it's worth a try. What you should do: check the sites you're taking into consideration – are they valuing privacy? do they have a relatable process to make sure not simply to expose everything about everyone without consent? are they trustworthy? Note that none of these services is free (and that's not nescessarily a bad thing, keeping them clean). Usually there's a free trial, allowing you, to check out whether it's good for you, so: do give it a try. It's become a long comment, so here's the ghist: Don't loose hope! There is someone out there waiting for you. Don't stop trying to find her!

  13. So they like to pretend that they are having sex with the other woman in porn? I dont care about lesbians but why the fuck do many of these women who are like this still date men?

  14. My first time was perfect tbh. It was when I was 14 (yr ago), the guy knew I was insecure and he made me feel super comfortable and the pace was very slow and he teased me to the point where I begged for it. I think the perfect first time is having expectations set and communication very good. Like for me I was worried about not having an orgasm, and I was insecure how I looked down there and luckily he actually told me he didnt want me to for my first time and he even told me to stop if I was about to, which was such a huge relief, and he also complimented me a lot which made me feel super relaxed. Omggg he was actually so hot and he teased so much I actually had my first orgasm (ever) that same night. I was with that guy for a whole year and he basically made me addicted LOL. Nobody has come close since, mostly bc guys my age are fucking balls in bed. Its why I go for older guys buuuut its really risky for them.. Thank fuck I just turned 16 yesterday lol

  15. It's usually wise to not speak for all women or their preferences. Myself for example have had anxiety disorders most of my life, at a time when i had anxiety and clinical depression concurrently i tried anti depressants for a few months. Couldnt orgasm, had lowered libido. It was enough for me to stop using them, and the last time i was on hormonal birth control it lead to some serious health complications i was not willing to risk for sex. I most certainly would have stopped birth control if i found myself vastly reduced in libido or orgasm ability. That doesnt make a woman selfish or weird. Nor does the OP have to be labelled an asshole for having his own needs, which are clearly not being met by his wife. She's not even accountable or willing to compromise. Huge red flag considering they've undertaken counselling together.

  16. What area of the world are you in? You can also try looking for swinger clubs on google. The club network my partner and I started in is called The Body Shop Clubs. Pretty sure they are all over the US.

  17. Yeah, I don't see it as an issue. Just like if a woman needed a vibrator to orgasm each time, I wouldn't see that as an issue either. One could make the case that if she cannot orgasm without it she would need to develop her body better to NOT need it. Just like if a man needs porn, you can make the case he should train his body to not need it. It's like telling a gay man he needs to stop being attracted to men and train his body to like women. You like what you like.

  18. Very hot but you need a real partner that can handle you like that an can keep going giving the the best an bring you past limits could also try kink as in restraints to help

  19. It’s very rare to have an internal orgasm and it’s not the same as clitoral. Once I realized I can’t have an orgasm from sex and started touching myself while having sex until I orgasm it changed sex for me it made it so much better!! It’s a totally different feeling than just masterbating but same concept rub your clit until you orgasm while your man is fucking you. It’s the best. Just go with it let loose and you’ll be so glad you did.

  20. Get her a Hitachi wand (at least) and a vat of lube. 52 here, she is 49, works like a complete champ. And she really enjoys, the important part. Make sure she is first and good things follow. She will come get YOU.

  21. Even if he does pull out, there is a chance you could still get pregnant. There are other forms of contraception you can use, from the pill to more 'permanent' ones like the implant or the coil. But pulling out is not a reliable one

  22. nefnaf- I have done both.I went 45-55 minutes non stop.I also finished within 5 minutes. It all depends on partner.The gf with whom i did for 55 minutes was responsive and happy.The second gf liked only quickies and hated longer durations. After careful experimentation, I arrived magical time= 10 minutes actual work with lots of fore and after play.

  23. For me I need to have daily sexual activity in order to have it hard. If I pause for few days I find it hard to have it full hard.

  24. Honestly thank you so much for some real life advice ? I’m realizing now that I do clench pretty intensely and that’s probably making it worse. I’ll definitely try to not do that at all until I reach orgasm (at which point it kind of just happens lol) As for the lube thing, the only time we’ve used it is when partway through things started to dry up a bit. Is it helpful to use from the get-go even when the water park is fully open for business? I guess I never thought additional lubrication was necessary or helpful in this case! I think we’ll give the numbing stuff another go, thankfully I’m not allergic. Thanks for the tip that you can just mix a tiny bit with lube if it’s a little too strong!

  25. Some anecdotal evidence of mine, but I’ve been in two marriages where I just assumed I had a low libido. Same in a couple different relationships since my divorces. I can be really into it at first but it always wanes to disinterest. The thought of it just didn’t excite me. Turns out it was the man. I am dating a man I’m very attracted to and two years in I’m still very excited by the idea of sex with him. My previous relationships weren’t with people I wasn’t put off by, but I compromised on spark for their other good qualities. I also read a book called Mating in Captivity that changed my life and taught me how to keep the spark/interest alive. That being said, however she feels you can’t change.

  26. Cheating kinks are totally normal, but talk with your partner FIRST. ALSO, do NOT jump into this kink feet first. This is not something you run into without ample preparation.

  27. Okay so, I rarely get my pubes waxed. But i can tell from experience that it isn't uncomfortable when hair grow post that. However, it is highly irritating and just downright painful when hair grow back after shaving. Wax is gonna hurt. Like a b*tch. But it also grows out soft in my case.

  28. Just say “Daaad, I'm not a little girl anymore, you can't call me a good girl now, just say I'm doing a good job ?”. That way you don't have to make it awkward and he won't suspect anything weird.

  29. For my wife, playing with her ass is a key trigger to make her cum. Fingering, a vibrator, my cock… everyone is wired differently. A good quality vibrator like a Magic Wand may be good to try. That is our go-to toy and makes my wife cum nearly 100% of the time, and she is on a lot of meds that make it hard for her to orgasm.

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